Self sovereignty in healing

Recent developments exposing the closely knit collusion between those in proximity
to daily activities with so-called not-so-intelligence surveillance networks impact the
ability for me to live a life of privacy and independence. Intense curiosity by those
who presume that they are in control of action mechanisms with wire terror and fraud
are now confronting their own vulnerabilities. My experience is a symptom of a larger
problem of societal denial and government ineptitude.

It is likely that questions about my own regenerative and healing process are being
asked. With sustained trauma and violence, including psychological violence, my frame
of reference is absolutely based on an engrained sense of living in country where law
and reason with guaranteed rights. In this context, being female of Japanese American
descent determines that my process of healing is directly linked to assuming personal,
institutional and financial power. Exacting a process of justice has been, and still is the
only priority I hold as necessary for this healing.

Political blood lust and thirst fuel my perspective when dealing with larger system
failures and corruption. Some quickly define my healing process through their own
limited generational viewpoint of a female experience being violated by male-based
institutional practices and unspoken mores. They consider that my healing must entail
finding "true romantic" affiliation as in a Western-type B-movie happy ending. They
diminish my role as a being fully equipped to participate in systems of power without
the exaggerated male hero figure who is often frustrated with his own disempowerment.

While contempt for female experience in Hawaii is found on all institutional levels,
on a social level, I have not had problems with men except for those with a deep
addictive process. Most men recognize when a female will not tolerate abuse and
violence.

Class-based contempt is different from gender-based contempt. The issue of class
is one of the most clandestine forms of subjugation as exemplified in my situation
with those of the white-collar professional groups, such as attorneys, physicians
and academics. They, of course, presume their knowledge is with a greater under-
standing of any political and personal situation.

Any expressed anger in my case is justified and expected on my part. My outrage
is part of the emotional fuel that allows me to appropriately channel my anger toward
those who are directly responsible for abuses and deprivation. Misuse of power and
anger is found frequently with those who believe they are above the law. They are
wrong in my case and they are identifiable.

Curiosity about the loves and losses of my life is probably the source of extrapolated
legend-making idiots who want to define my experience in terms of a movie script
when, in fact, the stakes are so terribly high that any attempt to diminish this experience
to some type of commercially viable profit-making project while justice has not been
served is likely to come crashing down in real life. Take that as a promise.

Phantom limbs, phantom souls

A few days ago, I spent some time chatting with a client who needed some
bodywork for wellness maintenance. Our conversation meandered into a
discussion about how one's frame of reference limits one's understanding.
An example that we discussed was the tendency for projecting one's own
paradigm of thought, belief and meaning onto someone else who may be
operating with a completely different paradigm of experience.

Not having first-hand knowledge of anything does not preclude the real
possibility that that reality exists. Those with limited real-life experience
in application of thoughts, beliefs and meaning generally carry abstraction
as their frame of reference. Those with limited conceptual development
generally carry only their experience as their reality. This could lead to
9-11 type catastrophic psychological and spiritual conditions for many.

Being atheist with a practice finding sacred moments of trust by living in
the present, does not preclude appreciation of having solid business plan
for creating of enterprise, nor does it preclude using hostile legal tactics to
exact my statement of conscience with the sinister approaches of attorneys
and those who consider themselves privy to "special" knowledge. Being
atheist does not mean I cannot consider the sacred practice of religions
founded in the belief of a single deity for centuries. It does not mean that
I want to coerce, project and define the reality of esoteric afficionados.

When a multi-dimensional life experience is found, where multiple aspects
of our being, physical, intellectual, psychological, spiritual , are applied in
real world political, economic, social and cultural, forcing a single frame of
reference onto others for domination usually results in a dynamic where
power issues must be articulated through an institutional framework to
address inequity or compete for dominance.

Power and control issues underlie all interactions between humans, groups
and systems. Without at least tacit acknowledgment of this there can be
no point of engagement to discuss an incorrect underlying premise about
rights and expectations. Take a look at all human discourse. All those who
are waging an internalized personal battle to achieve what they believe is
theirs, have an underlying assumption about those with whom they co-habit.

Watching any destabilized human system is where we can find the gaps of
self-awareness about the need for power and control. When one loses one's
limb due to amputation, there is the syndrome known as "phantom limb"
syndrome. This syndrome results in the person still having a sensation that
this limb exists on a kinesthetic level. Like losing a deeply loved person, or
a deeply loved principle. The shock does not allow the nervous system to
take in this awareness immediately.

Likewise, when one has lost one's sense of self-dignity, it is like watching the
towers of 9-11 implode leaving a vast empty space where the soul once lived,
thrived and pleasured. Phantom limbs and phantom souls should provide the
meditation need for those living a self-imposed nightmare of denial of what
they really need to be whole.